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and drill into an active volcano:

Yellowstone National Park’s days as a pristine ecological retreat could be numbered if Wyoming gubernatorial candidate Taylor Haynes (R) gets his way.

Haynes, a physician and former trustee at the University of Wyoming, wants all national parks and federal lands in Wyominmushroom cloudg to be turned over to the state. According to the Casper Star Tribune, Haynes wants to allow all lands in Wyoming, including Yellowstone, to be leased for drilling, mining, and grazing. “We will manage every square inch of Wyoming,” the gubernatorial hopeful said …

Haynes is not the only politician who wants to sully national parks by letting oil and mineral companies in. Others, including Reps. Pete Olson (R-TX), Michele Bachmann (R-MN), and Rob Bishop (R-UT), also want to open up public lands for drilling. Bishop, who chairs the House Subcommittee on Public Lands and Environmental Regulation, downplayed his plan, telling ThinkProgress that he wanted to allow mining around the Grand Canyon in an area merely the size of New Jersey.

Even as drilling in national parks is favored by many Tea Partiers, polling shows that the vast majority of Western voters, including Republicans, actually prefer conservation. The Center for Western Priorities recently surveyed voters, finding that two-in-three Western voters were more likely to support a candidate who wanted to enhance protections for public lands, including 59 percent of Republicans. Three-quarters of Western voters said they opposed proposals to sell off public lands.

These people are so fucking stupid they shouldn’t be allowed to live.

 

global_temperature_anomalySo put down the Ambien, Prozac, Viagra and crotch-shots of CNN/Fox Kool-Aid and turn off the television, because today the State Water Resources Control Board in California established statewide mandatory water restrictions for the first time.

Ever.

All of California is in some type of drought and reservoirs are precariously low in many places. The nation’s largest reservoir, Lake Mead in Nevada, recently reached an all-time low. So now the impact of the enduring drought has extended beyond warning.

“Many urban Californians don’t realize how bad a drought the state is in,” board chair Felicia Marcus said last week. “It is a mistake to think that they are not at risk. What these regulations propose is not that everyone kill off their lawns, but that at a minimum, people don’t over-water.”

The restrictions would ban wasteful outdoor watering, such as sprinkler water that runs onto the sidewalk or street. Hosing down sidewalks and driveways would also be banned and washing a car would require a shut-off nozzle on the hose. Maximum penalties could reach up to $500, enforceable by any public employee empowered to enforce laws, including local water agencies. Warnings and escalating fines would likely be the more moderated approach. If the restrictions prove ineffective or the drought worsens, tougher restrictions could be considered.

You are a clear and present danger to my grandchildrens’ survival.

Fear me.

Young Mr Drum, over at Mother Jones:

Well. I grew up with a house full of Adler typewriters, all of them fine products of German engineering. I think later on they became fine products of not-so-German engineering, but I’m sure it’s still possible to find some of the old school models. They should work a treat for creating documents that are safe from prying eyes, since we all know that spies were never able to steal documents prior to the digital era.

Emphasis added.

That is all.

shotgunIt just burns…

FREMONT TOWNSHIP, MI — A 51-year-old woman accidentally shot herself in the face after she slammed the butt end of a shotgun on the floor, causing it to discharge, the Tuscola County Sheriff’s Department reports.

Deputies were called about 10 a.m. Monday, July 14, to a house on Waterman in Fremont Township for a report of a gunshot victim.

Upon arrival, deputies found that a family dispute had taken place and the victim, a 51-year-old woman, told officers that she had taken a shotgun out to “make a point.”

She told police she slammed the butt end on the floor, the gun discharged, and she was shot in the face.

She certainly made a point. Maybe if she puts her hat on right… it won’t show.

ROTFLMAO

darwineatsToday’s Supreme Court ruling in Hobby Lobby in a nutshell, down to brass tacks, ones and zeros: if you are a “christian”, you are above the law.

If you are above the law, don’t ask me to obey your laws. Genius make their own rules, and do not accept the monkey customs of their lessors. I accept the rules you feel necessary. If I find them tolerable, I tolerate them; if I find them obnoxious, I break them. I am free because I alone am responsible for what I do.

Were it not a clear and present threat to my grandchildren’s survival, one man’s religion would be another man’s belly laugh. Substitute “Jew” or “Muslim” for “Christian”, there’s no difference. Animals, less than sufficiently evolved, less than human, bow down to gods. Human Beings, do not.

We are legion. We do not forgive. We do not forget.

Fear us.

Climate Progress, ever-vigilant and multi-tasking, delivers:

  • Politico delivered its must-read analysis, “Barack Obama becomes mocker-in-chief on climate change skeptics.” Yes, you knew President Obama spoke Wednesday night at a League of Conservation Voters gala. But only Politico has the bombshell scoop from White House political director David Simas, who said “Humor is a very, very good thing— especially in a place where voters just don’t understand why folks in Washington don’t get what they get.” CP could not agree more with Simas.
  • The New Yorker’s satirical piece somehow connecting “Mad Men” to global warming: “Prestige TV in the time of climate change.” It opens:

    Marci was watching television in her fourth-floor walk-up on West Twenty-first Street on the day the water reached the base of the streetlights. She stood up from her couch and let her carton of chocolate coconut Bliss fall to the floor. “Holy shit,” she said. “Don and Peggy do hook up. I knew it. I mean, I didn’t know it. But, on some level, I knew it.”

  • The award-winning sketch comedy team Temple Horses skewers the media with their report, “In Depth: Climate Change”:

 

  • The Guardian takes on the clown car that is the denialist camp, with “Global warming conspiracy theorist zombies devour Telegraph and Fox News brains.” Environmental scientist Dana Nuccitelli re-debunks “the long-debunked conspiracy theorist myth that scientists are falsifying temperature data to conjure global warming and frighten the masses.”The piece ends with some great advice for journalists who want to avoid being suckered by the umpteenth pie in the face from the deniers:

    Some advice for journalists — the next time you hear a global warming myth that sounds too good to be true, before letting the zombie snack on your brains, check SkepticalScience.com first to see if it’s riddled with scientific debunking bullet wounds.

  • Tamino dismantles the deniers’ phony attacks on leading climatologist Michael Mann, with “Anthony Watts and the Bottom of the Barrel.” Bottom line: “What’s the take-home message here? That Anthony Watts and his crew are so eager to criticize global warming that they can’t be bothered to get the facts straight first. Even when it’s easy to do so. Even when there are multiple ways to do so.”Who takes these guys seriously anymore?
  • Finally, I’m pretty sure you missed the latest NOAA-led study on the dangerously high methane leakage rates of natural gas drilling — because NOAA doesn’t seem to have put out a press release on it. I guess they think this once-controversial finding is now old news. Scientific American (via Climate Wire) is one of the few outlets with the story, “Leaky Methane Makes Natural Gas Bad for Global Warming” :

    Natural gas fields globally may be leaking enough methane, a potent greenhouse gas, to make the fuel as polluting as coal for the climate over the next few decades, according to a pair of studies published last week.

    An even worse finding for the United States in terms of greenhouse gases is that some of its oil and gas fields are emitting more methane than the industry does, on average, in the rest of the world, the research suggests.

    I guess that makes America’s big push on fracking and LNG as part of our climate-action effort the World Cup equivalent of an own goal.

Climate change is happening, fool, so put down the Ambien, Prozac, Viagra and crotch-shots on CNN/Fox Kool-Aid and turn off the television, because you are a clear and present danger to our species’ survival.

We are legion. We do not forgive. We do not forget. Expect us.

EXPECT US!

gundildoWith the tagline, “If they find it, they’ll play with it. So always lock up your guns,” advocacy group Evolve has released an ad, intended to go viral, featuring young boys playing with dildos.

In the ad, a young mother is picking up her son from a play-date as the two boys race around the house. As the mothers chat, the two boys  burst through the front door and into the front yard, engaging in a sword fight with  the discovered sex toys in front of their startled and embarrassed mothers.

The ad comes from gun safety advocacy group Evolve, founded in the wake of the 2012 Sandy Hook shootings that left 28 dead, including shooter Adam Lanza.

According to their website, Evolve does not take a position on the legislative side of the gun debate, instead seeking to reduce gun violence by encouraging gun owners to use common sense when owning weapons.

Claiming to represent both gun owners and non-gun owners, Evolve is attempting to build a public campaign round gun safety removed from the acrimony between the NRA and so-called ‘gun-grabbers.’

According to Evolve co-founder Rebecca Bond’s Linkedin page, “Evolve is a group of gun owners and non-gun owners who are only interested in one thing: firearms safety and reduction of violence through personal behaviors and education. ”

Evolve’s guiding ‘Code,’ states –among other things– “I believe that gun ownership is not just a right. It’s a responsibility,” “I believe that while anyone can own a gun, real gun owners use their heads,” and “I will be answerable for every gun I own.”

Via Lawyers Guns and Money, all those liberals driving Priuses make big strong tough American white men feel threatened.

dodge ram exposedIn small towns across America, manly men are customizing their jacked-up [de-engineered suburban assault vehicles with tires the size of Volkswagons and the hood ornament a perfect rendition of the human female reproductive system*] diesel trucks to intentionally emit giant plumes of toxic smoke every time they rev their engines. They call it “rollin’ coal,” and it’s something they do for fun.

An entire subculture has emerged on the Internet surrounding this soot-spewing pastime—where self-declared rednecks gather on Facebook pages (16,000 collective followers) Tumblers and Instagram (156,714 posts) to share photos and videos of their Dodge Rams and GM Silverados purposefully poisoning the sky. As one of their memes reads: “Roll, roll, rollin’ coal, let the hybrid see. A big black cloud. Exhaust that’s loud. Watch the city boy flee.”

Aside from being macho, the rollin’ coal culture is also a renegade one. Kids make a point of blowing smoke back at pedestrians, in addition to cop cars and rice burners (Japanese-made sedans), which can make it dangerously difficult to see out of the windshield. Diesel soot can also be a great road rage weapon should some wimpy looking Honda Civic ever piss you off. “If someone makes you mad, you can just roll coal, and it makes you feel better sometimes,” says Ryan, a high school senior who works at the diesel garage with Robbie. “The other day I did it to this kid who was driving a Mustang with his windows down, and it was awesome.”

* Yes, I coined that descriptor.

Go below the fold for a really cool tattoo…

Read the rest of this entry »

graffitiU.S. gross domestic product contracted at 2.9 percent in 1st quarter, worst showing in five years

First detailed report on specific U.S. geographical risk factors associated with climate change. Climate change is happening, fool, so put down the Ambien, Prozac, Viagra and crotch-shots on CNN/Fox Kool-Aid and turn off the television.

The Drone Murder Memo: Your Puny Laws Say Nothing That Can Stop Us  AND  A Few Notes on Our Continuing Gun Derangement

Large swathes of America “will be unsuitable for outdoor activity”World’s Oceans on Brink of Collapse

Pennsylvania School Board Rejects Proposal To Include Climate Denial In Textbooks.

Systemic pesticides pose global threat to biodiversity, harming bees, butterflies, fish and birds. More than half of the plants being sold at major garden retailers under the guise of being “bee-friendly” are treated with bee-killing pesticides, according to a report released Wednesday.

And, finally, you just can’t make this shit up: Tweeting Penis Got GOP Staffer Gone – Rep. Steve Stivers’ (Retard-Ohio) chief of staff, Adam Kuhn, has resigned after he got weinered, or favred, in reverse if you like on Twitter by his angry porn star – now ex – girlfriend.

jesus-automaticYou just can’t make this stuff up!

A man in Macon, Georgia accidentally shot himself in the penis while attempting to holster his gun last week.

According to WMAZ Channel 13, the man was parked at a gas station and was attempting to put away the .45 caliber pistol when it discharged, striking him in the groin.The man immediately drove to a friend’s house.

According to police, the victim dropped his pants to find that he had shot himself in the penis and that the bullet had exited his body through the buttocks. As he disrobed, the spent round fell to the floor.

These animals aren’t just a threat to my grandchildren’s survival.

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