I am at the end of my rope, but have neither the courage nor the cowardice to take myself out. No income, no prospects, everything I ever worked for washed down the toilet. Not only does every day it get worse, but there are those deliberately making it worse. I often contemplate suicide by cop – just start taking out anyone and everyone who’s ever fucked with me and not stop till the cops take me out – but that wouldn’t do my kids or my grandkids any good, and truth be told I’d prefer to outlive these… pigs. I could though.
Susie’s friend’s story is my story, and perhaps a couple/three million, maybe ten, maybe twenty million other late fifties highly intelligent well educated professionals around the country. The creme d’la creme. The Best Generation. The conservative christian republicans running the country are trying to kill us, trying to kill me, just as they killed Susie’s friend. When I suicide it won’t be suicide, it’ll be on the front lines of the revolution, making the world a better place for my grandchildren.
You know that old canard about Bankers jumping from high-rises on Black Tuesday? It’s just that, a canard. They didn’t jump. They were thrown. History only repeats to those paying attention. Just in my lifetime I have seen history completely rewritten into a profit driven lie that the vast majority – illiterate bare footed rubes drunk on Ambien, Prozac, Viagra and crotch-shots on Fox News Kool-Aid blindly following their television to suicide – swallow like, well… Kool-Aid. Jonestown Kool-Aid.
They’re not just trying to kill me, they are trying to kill my kids, and my grandkids. Your great grandkids. For profit. And Jesus.
Fear me, as I have nothing to lose, and no fear.